Laken's Surrender (Haven) Read online

  “Let me get this straight. Your father has finally realized that your only talent is finding something to stick your dick into, is that right? He discovered that I’m the one with the talent and not you. That’s all I really mean to you and your father. Cash in your back pockets from my designs.”

  “That’s not true. I miss you, lovely Laken.”

  “Well, I don’t miss you. I’m much happier where I am. Now do the right thing for once in your life and leave me alone.”

  “There is no way you can be happy in that small, hick town. Come on, darling, I know you must feel the need to punish me, but there is no need to punish yourself by staying there. Come home.”

  “I am home. Fuck off.”

  She slammed the phone down, shaking with anger. How dare he try to play around with her life! She meant nothing to Ricky, probably never had. She had just been a way for him to gain his father’s attention. She’d thought their relationship was something she wanted after the intensity of what she had shared with Duncan. She had thought that having someone who made no demands on her, who let her do as she pleased, was what she needed.

  Unfortunately, she chose an asshole who fucked anything that moved. What a naïve fool she had been. Grabbing up the flowers, she went to stuff them in the trash. Except…they were so beautiful and it wasn’t their fault that a cheating, lying bastard had bought them.

  So instead of throwing them away, she searched out a vase and placed them on the table. Arranging them, she stood back and took a deep breath. What a morning—first Duncan storming in and making demands, then Ricky trying to charm her back to New York.

  Truthfully, she didn’t miss the city that much. She thought she would, but she was enjoying being close to her family and Lila, and even if Duncan was driving her insane, it was better than listening to Ricky’s snobby, whiny voice go on and on about himself.

  Sitting at her table, she grabbed a pen and paper and threw herself into her work.

  ***

  Laken placed her pencil down then stood and stretched. She glanced over at the clock. Eleven-thirty. She’d been working non-stop for the last two hours.

  A knock sounded on her door, drawing her attention. She frowned. When the hell had her apartment become Grand Central Station? Storming over, she pulled the door open with a snarl.

  “What the hell do you…” her voice trailed off as she saw Saxon standing there. As usual he was beautifully dressed in a dark-green shirt that matched his eyes and neatly-pressed slacks. She couldn’t help but compare him to Duncan. They were both attractive men, but where Saxon was suave and sleek, Duncan was rough and sturdy. Duncan favored jeans and t-shirts. She’d bet Saxon didn’t even own a t-shirt.

  “Saxon, sorry, I didn’t expect to see you.”

  His eyebrows rose. “Who were you expecting? And do you need me to have a word with them?”

  She shook her head and he narrowed his gaze at her. Laken wondered how a woman could be expected to keep anything secret from this man. He would accept nothing less than everything—complete and utter submission.

  “Is someone bothering you, Laken?” he drawled, his voice smooth as Scotch.

  “Ah, no,” she said. Then realizing that he was still standing on her doorstep, she took a step back, inviting him in.

  “You wouldn’t be lying to me now would you, sweetheart?” he asked calmly as he stared around her apartment.

  She wondered what he thought as he took in her threadbare couch, a hand-me-down from her fathers and the beat up table and chairs she’d gotten from the second-hand shop.

  She hadn’t felt ashamed when Duncan was here. Although he might be rich now, Duncan knew what it was like to be dirt poor. Saxon, on the other hand, looked like he’d been wrapped in silk sheets as a baby.

  Why the hell hadn’t she done some housework this morning? With a silent groan, she glanced around at the unfolded laundry and papers strewn everywhere.

  “I’m fine. Duncan was here earlier and I thought it was him at the door.”

  Saxon gazed at her for a long moment before nodding. “And what did our famous football player want?”

  To warn me away from you. The words were on the tip of her tongue, but she bit them back. “Ah, I’m not really sure. We don’t really get along nowadays.”

  “But you did once?” Saxon asked.

  “Is there something I can do for you, Saxon?” she asked desperately, not wanting to go into her past with Duncan. That was something she hadn’t even told Lila about.

  “Call me Joel, please,” he told her charmingly. She’d never heard anyone call him Joel. “I’m actually here to beg something of you.”

  She gaped at him for a moment. “What’s that?” When he turned on the charm…whew, she could barely refrain from fanning herself.

  “Come have lunch with me. My chef is preparing a number of trial dishes for the restaurant I’m opening and I need to try them out. I’d love to get a female perspective.”

  “Well, I’m not an expert when it comes to food.”

  He raised an eyebrow. “You do eat, don’t you?”

  “Well, yes.”

  “And you’re female. I mean, if it were left to me, I’d just have steak on the menu. I would appreciate your help.”

  She stared at him, remembering Duncan’s words from the night before. “Is this payment for my debt?”

  “Not at all,” he said. “This is me asking a favor from someone I hope might be my friend.”

  He stepped closer and leaned down. God, was he going to kiss her?

  Did she want him to? Duncan’s image flitted through her mind. No matter how potent Joel Saxon was, he wasn’t the man who haunted her dreams.

  “Please, won’t you help me out?”

  It would take a stronger woman than her to resist him. Duncan’s warning to stay away from this man ran through her head. But he wasn’t her Dom any longer. She could have lunch with whomever she wished. Plus, it sounded a hell of a lot more appetizing than the peanut butter and jelly sandwich she was about to prepare.

  “Thank you, I’d like that. Should I bring anything?”

  “Nothing at all. If you’re ready now, I will escort you over.”

  “Well.” She looked down at herself. “I’m not exactly dressed…”

  Saxon grinned. “Laken, you’re coming to my home, not Windsor Castle. What you have on is fine.”

  “Okay, just let me run a brush through my hair.” She moved hastily into the bathroom after waiting for his nod of agreement. There was no mistaking him for anything but a Dom.

  She washed her face and tied her strawberry-blonde hair back into a ponytail. Grabbing some mascara, she swiped it over her eyelashes. Well, that would have to do. She looked at herself in the mirror, barely recognizing the gaunt woman staring back at her. When had she gotten so thin? When had she stopped caring about the way she looked? Her normally vibrant hair lay flat and lifeless around her shoulders and it desperately needed a cut.

  Her blue eyes stood out against the paleness of her skin and the dark bags beneath them. She pinched her cheeks, hoping to give them some desperately-needed color.

  Stepping back out, she found Saxon staring at her flowers.

  “Nice flowers—are they from Duncan?”

  She snorted as she grabbed her handbag. “No. Just an old, umm, acquaintance.”

  Saxon frowned lightly, giving her a quelling glance that had her instantly feeling guilty, but she didn’t elaborate and he nodded before opening the door.

  She pulled it closed behind her then with a light blush, took his offered arm.

  Chapter Four

  Laken leaned back with a sigh. “I am stuffed. It was all so good.”

  She hadn’t eaten this well in a long time. She’d never had the money when she was studying, then once she’d started working… Well, Ricky had always been on a diet, so they’d never gone out to eat. Not that he was a large man—in fact, he was about the same size she was. But what calories he did take in wer
e usually in liquid form and Laken didn’t like eating out alone.

  She glanced around, scarcely able to believe that she was sitting on Joel Saxon’s terrace, his pool glistening to the left of them. To her right, French doors led into his large house. She’d always thought that he lived in his club. But instead of entering the club, he’d taken her around the back to a private entrance and into his magnificent house, which was surrounded by a thick cluster of trees.

  Saxon smiled as he leaned back in his chair, a glass of red wine in his hand. “I’m glad you enjoyed it.” Laken picked up her own glass of wine, looking down into the deep, red drink

  Dirty whore. You like that, don’t you?

  She swallowed heavily, pushing away the memory.

  “I’d love to know what that thought was,” Saxon said casually.

  She glanced up, meeting his sharp, green gaze.

  Laken sent him what she hoped was a confident smile. “A girl’s got to have some secrets.”

  “Maybe,” he agreed, and she relaxed a little. “But a sub shouldn’t keep anything that upsets her from her Dom. It’s his duty to take care of her, and to do that he needs to know what haunts her.”

  She gaped at him. “But you’re not my Dom.”

  He swirled the rich, red liquid in his glass. “Would you like me to be?”

  “Joel, you’d eat me up and spit me out.” And he would. Duncan, despite the fact that he could be blunt and gruff, had an amazing amount of patience. Saxon would be a whole different ballgame. She had no doubt he would want total control.

  Instead of being insulted, he laughed. “I promise, honey, that if I were ever to eat you that I would never be so crass as to spit. Oh no, I would most definitely savor the taste.”

  A wave of heat filled her blood as she stared at him, unable to look away. Was he serious? He was joking, right? Surely he wasn’t talking about…

  Saxon chuckled. “Ahh, the look on your face is adorable. I love a woman who blushes. So many subs are jaded. Not you, my darling Laken. However, I can see I’ve overwhelmed you, so perhaps that is enough for today. I’m sure you must have some work to do?”

  She nodded, suddenly finding herself without any words, not a normal occurrence for her. Saxon just smiled and moved his chair back.

  “Excuse me, Sir.” The gray-haired man who had served them lunch appeared in the doorway, an apologetic look on his face.

  “Yes, Thomas?”

  “There are two gentlemen here to see you. Eli and Kellan Jones.”

  Duncan’s two older brothers? What would they be here to see Saxon about?

  She glanced over at Saxon with interest. His forehead creased into a frown. Obviously he hadn’t been expecting the two men.

  “Sorry to interrupt your cozy lunch,” a raspy voice said. Two large men appeared behind Thomas. They stepped around Thomas who was scowling at them. They’d probably been told to wait in the foyer. However, if they were anything like Duncan then they were no doubt stubborn and tenacious—they wouldn’t be satisfied with waiting for what they wanted. They’d do what was necessary to make sure they got what they wanted.

  “As you can see I don’t have time to talk to you gentleman,” Saxon said smoothly, although Laken thought she heard just a hint of annoyance in his tone.

  “Come on, Saxon,” the same one spoke again. She didn’t know them very well, but she thought he was Eli. He ran his gaze over Laken in interest. “You wouldn’t speak to us last night because you were working. You’re not working now.”

  “Perhaps I’m not interested in speaking to you at all,” Saxon said so coldly that she almost shivered.

  The silent one turned to Laken. He had a harder face than his brother. Cold.

  “Laken Michaels,” the talkative one said. “I’m surprised to see you here. I thought you would have better taste in companions.”

  Her temper surged at his words. Except for a slight tightening of his shoulders, Saxon gave no reaction to the words.

  “And just what would you know about me, Eli Jones?” she replied. She’d obviously guessed right as he didn’t correct her.

  “Do you two normally just barge into other people’s homes?” she asked. “I thought you were security consultants; I didn’t realize that gave you the right to forget your manners.”

  “Whoever told you that we had manners was lying, sweetheart,” Eli replied in that raspy voice. “And we need to talk to Mr Saxon here about the murder of a sub.”

  Murder?

  Saxon raised his eyebrows. “Are you accusing me of something, Mr Jones? Should I have my lawyer present?” he asked mockingly.

  Eli’s nostrils flared. “Not at all. We merely have a few questions.”

  “Tell me, does being a security consultant include having to watch Law and Order reruns in order to practice your lines?” Saxon asked.

  Laken bit her lip to stop her smile as Eli and Kellan stiffened.

  Saxon sighed. “Relax, gentlemen. No need to get out the rubber hoses. I’ll talk. After I escort Laken home.”

  “That’s okay, it’s not that far…” her voice trailed off as he gave her a look that brooked no argument.

  Laken swallowed heavily. Yep, she was no match for Joel Saxon. She quickly said goodbye to Eli and Kellan, glad to get away from the growing testosterone levels, and allowed Saxon to walk her home.

  See, who said she didn’t know when to give in graciously?

  ***

  Laken moved around like a zombie the next day. Luckily, it was a busy day so she didn’t have much time to think about things. She’d done enough thinking last night to last a lifetime.

  All night she’d replayed the run-in with Duncan, the phone call with Ricky and then lunch with Saxon. Why did it seem like she couldn’t move without tripping over a man? She was hardly some femme fatale and yet, Saxon had been flirting with her yesterday, hadn’t he?

  Ricky, she knew, wanted to use her. But what was Saxon up to? Was he truly interested in her? He was sexy, gorgeous, smart and successful, and although she couldn’t deny there was some attraction between them, it was only a spark of interest.

  Why didn’t she feel more for him?

  Because the only man she’d ever loved still held her in his spell.

  No matter what she tried to tell herself, she still loved Duncan. Ricky had never made her feel as loved or as safe as Duncan had.

  Perhaps she was better off alone. Neither Duncan nor Saxon would truly want her when they saw the scars she bore. Thankfully, most of her visible scars had faded after a year, only two deep tissue scars remained and with the help of some powerful creams they had faded considerably. It was the ones on the inside that took longer to mend.

  After she locked the front door to the shop, Laken moved around the room tidying up displays and putting clothes back on hangers.

  A bang on the glass door made her jump with a squeal. Berating herself for being such a scaredy-cat, she turned. She frowned as she saw Duncan standing there, arms crossed over his chest, a scowl on his face.

  Placing her hands on her hips, she glared at him. He showed no sign of backing down. Instead, he uncrossed his arms slowly and then held up one hand, crooking his finger at her.

  The nerve of the man.

  Laken raised her brows at him and shook her head. He could arrogantly dictate all he liked. Didn’t mean she had to do what he said, although as his face grew darker, more stern, she felt her stomach quiver with the urge to submit.

  “Laken,” he called out. “Either you open this door or I will break it down.”

  Hell. One thing she knew about Duncan was that he did not make false threats.

  Storming over, she unlocked the door, allowing him entrance. He stepped in, instantly overwhelming her shop with his presence.

  “You can’t just bully people to get your way. I should make a complaint to Jake,” she muttered grumpily.

  Duncan raised an eyebrow as he leaned back against the counter and watched her. “I’m not in uniform
and if you wouldn’t fight me at every turn then I wouldn’t have to force you to talk to me. Do you really dislike me that much? Are you still holding on to so much anger that you can’t even be in the same room as me?”

  Her anger deflated as she stared at him, shocked by the hurt in his gaze.

  “I’m not angry with you, Duncan. My anger disappeared about six hours after you stood me up that night.” This was a mistake. She should just continue to hurl insults and bile his way until he gave up on her. And yet she couldn’t keep hurting him, no matter how much she wanted to protect herself.

  “Then why won’t you talk to me? You’ll have lunch with Joel Saxon; but for me, you won’t even open your door.”

  “I was doing Saxon a favor. Nothing more.”

  “Are you trying to punish me then? By keeping me at a distance? Is having lunch with Saxon at his place a way of making me pay for standing you up that night? For not giving you enough attention while we were together?”

  “Of course not.”

  “I’m sorry you felt like I was ignoring you,” he continued. “That night was a complete mess. One of my team ended up in the hospital after a training session went wrong. We were having a debrief that went well into the night. But I’m not making excuses. I should have called you.”

  “Duncan—”

  “You’ve refused me every time I’ve asked you out, but Saxon clicks his fingers and you go running? I know I made mistakes—God knows that neither of us were perfect— but when are you going to stop running from me, little girl?”

  Laken’s temper sparked and this time she couldn’t keep it under control. “First of all, I’m not running from you. Just because I don’t want to talk to you does not mean I am trying to punish you. Maybe I just don’t want anything to do with you. Maybe I’m not attracted to you anymore!”

  As soon as she said it, she wished it back. His eyes narrowed, devouring her.